(M.J.E. / Quotes)


      I have at last given in to the temptation to have a page of favourite quotes on my web site, after thinking for the couple of years this web site has been here that I lacked both the interest and the material for such a page. I have collected jokes that appealed to me for quite a few years, and in fact I was going to have a number of joke pages on this site, before I realized that both allotted web-site space and copyright were going to cause problems with this.
      (I'd be willing to bet that at least some of the millions of jokes on the Internet are covered by copyright, and that very few of the authors of those pages have actually bothered to get permission to use the material. I think there's a feeling, which I largely share, that jokes become, or should become, the common property of everyone, and that maybe their spread shouldn't be inhibited by copyright - especially if the original printed sources are long out of print, as they very often are. But where do you draw the line between jokes (which you may want to exempt from copyright) and other written material which would continue to come under the usual rules? After all, someone was the first to write a joke down, and they would claim it was their material, and should be protected.
      (So, no joke pages on this site: I have so many hundreds of really funny (and sometimes very naughty) jokes, that I know once I started I wouldn't want to finish.)
      But over the last year or so I've noticed many interesting, thought-provoking, funny, perceptive, and plain crazy quotes, and made a note of them, because I didn't want to lose them and thought I might never come across them again. I was actually torn between the desire to arrange my e-mail so that a random quote would be added to the end, like many people do, and the realization that this would be regarded as clutter to many recipients of e-mail, and might irritate them. Maybe I won't do that; but it seems I have enough of these quotes to make a decent quotes page myself - so here it is.
      I've grouped roughly similar quotes by topic or tone together, but otherwise it's a motley collection based on nothing other than appeal to my sense of humour, or my own personal interests, or my sense of what life is about. Especially in the last of these, what they say about life may contradict each other - so what does that say about my sense of what life is about? Yes, you got it: it is contradictory; and, in the end, I don't know what life is about - if it is about anything at all.
      If you like some of the quotations I've collected here, and feel you have more that, judging by the sample already given here, you think will appeal to me, by all means send them to me. But I can't guarantee to use them on this page - there are a squillion quotes on the Internet, many of which I have access to, and I have to be highly selective in what I use, and the ones chosen have to appeal to my sense of humour, or my outlook on life, or my sense of the absurd in some special way.
      On a few occasions, I have included a quote not because I identify with it or agree with it, but because it seems especially clever or witty, or makes a point that is interesting, even if I don't agree with it. In one or two of these instances of disagreement, so strong are my doubts about it that I cannot resist following it with a response from myself. I will identify these reactions with my initials (M.J.E.).

Wednesday, 17 September, 2002.
Michael Edwards,
Victoria, Australia.

E-mail me.

      Click here if you need an explanation for the strange appearance of the e-mail address which will appear when you click on the e-mail link, or if you don't know what you need to do to make the e-mail address work properly.

Note: This page was added to my web site at a time when the entire style and colouring scheme of my site is being revised, and is still in a state of indecision. Because of this, the page is entirely without colouring or style of any kind. However, I present it now, since the actual text itself is formatted correctly and is quite readable.

Top - ( Spiritual, Mystical ) - ( Philosophical ) - ( Sceptical ) - ( Music, Arts ) - ( Society, Politics ) -
( Mathematics, Science ) - ( Computers ) - ( Aviation ) - ( Humorous ) - ( Quirky )

( Spiritual, Mystical )

Until we get rid of religion, we won't be able to conduct the search for God.
      - Arthur C. Clarke (English science and science-fiction writer, 1917 - ) (possibly paraphrased rather than verbatim)

An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind.
      - "Mahatma" Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi, Indian nationalist leader (1869 - 1948)

In the world of an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth, you pretty soon run out of eyes, and of teeth.
      - Phillip Adams, on 2 April, 2002, referring to conflict between Israelis and Palestinians (possibly quoting from some other source?)

Second star to the right, and straight on 'til morning...
      - Sir James Barrie: Peter Pan

The search for truth is much more precious than its possession.
      - Albert Einstein (American (German-born) theoretical physicist, 1879 - 1955)

Ask not whether a particular belief is true, but is it useful?
      - Anon.

Everything is okay in the end. If it's not okay, then it's not the end.
      - Anon.

The atheist staring from his attic window is often nearer to God than the believer caught up in his own false image of God.
      - Martin Buber

          During my last year in high school,       I found out
          about the Liberal Catholic Church.          It was
          in a beautiful spot in the Hollywood hills.
             The ceremony was an anthology of   the most
          theatrical bits and pieces found in the principal
          rituals,       Occidental and Oriental.
          There were clouds of incense,       candles galore,
                processions in and around the church.
           I was fascinated,       and though I had been raised
          in the Methodist Episcopal Church    and had had
          thoughts of going into the ministry,        I decided
          to join the Liberal Catholics.           Mother and
          Dad objected strenuously.           Ultimately,
              when I told them of my intention to become an
          acolyte active in the Mass,        they said,
           ``Well, make up your mind.            It's us or the
          church.''            Thinking along the lines of
          ``Leave your father and mother and follow Me,''
                 I went to the priest,          told him what
          had happened,          and said I'd decided in favor
          of the Liberal Catholics.               He said,
                 ``Don't  be  a  fool.                Go  home.
                         There  are  many  religions.
               You  have  only  one  mother  and   father.''
      - John Cage (U.S. composer and Zen Buddhist, 1912 - 1992)

If something is boring after two minutes, try it for four. If still boring, try it for eight, sixteen, thirty-two, and so on. Eventually one discovers that it's not boring at all but very interesting.
      - John Cage (U.S. composer, 1912 - 1992)

Last year ... I made a short talk. That was because I was talking about something; but this year I am talking about nothing and of course will go on talking for a long time.
      - John Cage (U.S. composer, 1912 - 1992)

Top - ( Spiritual, Mystical ) - ( Philosophical ) - ( Sceptical ) - ( Music, Arts ) - ( Society, Politics ) -
( Mathematics, Science ) - ( Computers ) - ( Aviation ) - ( Humorous ) - ( Quirky )

( Philosophical )

He never grew up, but he never stopped growing.
      - Arthur C. Clarke's possible epitaph

Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.
      - Philip K. Dick (American science-fiction writer, 1928 - 1982)

      Philosophical grook

A bit beyond perception's reach
I sometimes believe I see
that Life is two locked boxes, each
containing the other's key.
      - Piet Hein (Danish poet and cartoonist, 1905 - 1996)

Words do not express thoughts very well. They always become a little different immediately after they are expressed, a little distorted, a little foolish.
      - Hermann Hesse (German-Swiss novelist and poet, 1877 - 1962): Siddhartha

The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it.
      - George Bernard Shaw

          Artists                            talk         a
            lot                            about

                  the         expression
             ``free         as         a         bird,''
                Feldman         went         to         a
           park         one         day
           and         spent         some         time
                            watching         our         feathered

            he         came         back,
                                            he         said,

                                             They're         not
                                    they're          fighting
                over          bits          of          food.''
      - John Cage (U.S. composer and Zen Buddhist, 1912 - 1992)

Information is not knowledge; knowledge is not wisdom; wisdom is not truth; truth is not beauty; beauty is not love; love is not music; music is the best.
      - Frank Zappa

Data isn't information; information isn't knowledge; knowledge isn't wisdom.
      - Chief Executive of The Commission for the Future, Ian Lowe; often quoted by Phillip Adams on "Late Night Live", A.B.C. radio current affairs program

Bits aren't bytes; bytes aren't data; data isn't facts; facts aren't information; information isn't knowledge; knowledge isn't understanding; understanding isn't insight; insight isn't wisdom; wisdom isn't enlightenment.
      - a slight elaboration of the preceding by myself

The perplexity of life arises from there being too many interesting things in it for us to be interested properly in any of them.
      - G. K. Chesterton (1843 - 1936): Tremendous Trifles 9, 1909

Money may not be able to buy happiness; but it does allow you to enjoy your unhappiness more.
      - Unknown: a thought I've had for many years - possibly made up by me, but also possibly based on some now forgotten comment I once read.

The past tempts us, the present confuses us and the future frightens us, and our lives slip away moment by moment... lost in that vast, terrible in-between.
      - Anon.; quoted on Geek Culture forum by "TMBWITW,PB".

Top - ( Spiritual, Mystical ) - ( Philosophical ) - ( Sceptical ) - ( Music, Arts ) - ( Society, Politics ) -
( Mathematics, Science ) - ( Computers ) - ( Aviation ) - ( Humorous ) - ( Quirky )

( Sceptical )

I contend that we are all atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours.
      - Stephen L. Roberts

Believing is easier than thinking. Hence so many more believers than thinkers.
      - Bruce Calvert

      I don't agree with this, actually: thinking can be difficult to a greater or lesser degree, depending on what you're thinking about, and in what manner; but, at least to me, believing is all but impossible - unless the thing I believe in is supported by adequate evidence. But in that case, I am not so much believing as much as observing an obvious fact; perhaps believing really occurs when there is no evidence to support the thing you believe. This is something I have yet to work out how to do by an act of will, and I'm not sure I'll ever manage it. Perhaps there's something strange about me, and I am different from most people, and maybe they do find it easier to believe than to think.
      Still, it's a neat and clever quote, and I have read something like this a number of times.

If 50 million people believe a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing.
      - Anatole France

Gods are fragile things; they may be killed by a whiff of science or a dose of common sense.
      - Chapman Cohen

Although it is said that faith can move mountains, experience shows that dynamite works better.
      - Unknown

I cannot persuade myself that a beneficent and omnipotent God would have designedly created parasitic wasps with the express intention of their feeding within the living bodies of Caterpillars.
      - Charles Darwin

If God made us in His image we have certainly returned the compliment.
      - Voltaire

Religion is regarded by the common people as true, by the wise as false, and by rulers as useful.
      - Seneca the Younger

Faith is believing in something you know ain't true.
      - Samuel Clemens (Mark Twain) (U.S. writer, 1835 - 1910)

If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.
      - Albert Einstein (American (German-born) theoretical physicist, 1879 - 1955)

Theists think all gods but theirs are false. Atheists simply don't make an exception for the last one.
      - Unknown

There once was a time when all people believed in God and the church ruled. This time was called the Dark Ages.
      - Richard Lederer

Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence.
      - Carl Sagan

RELIGIOUS ACCUSATION: Atheism is a religion!
ATHEIST REPLY: Like baldness is a hair colour?
      - Anon.

The universe is precisely as it would be if there were no God, no good, no evil.
      - Richard Dawkins, Unweaving the Rainbow (possibly paraphrased)

      I can't find this quote now; perhaps I got confused between books, and I was thinking of the following very similar quote which appears in a different book; yet I still feel sure I did read a version of this in Unweaving the Rainbow.

The universe we observe has precisely the properties we should expect if there is, at bottom, no design, no purpose, no evil and no good, nothing but blind pitiless indifference.
      - Richard Dawkins, River Out of Eden: A Darwinian View of Life (1995)
      - Also in essay "God's Utility Function", almost word for word the same

If you talk to God, you're praying. If God talks back, it's schizophrenia.
      - Phil Spector (U.S. rock music record producer and songwriter, 1940 - ).

It's easy to understand God as long as you don't have to explain him.
      - Phil Spector (U.S. rock music record producer and songwriter, 1940 - ).

Sometimes I think there's no reason to get out of bed... then I feel wet, and I realize there is.
      - Homer Simpson, from The Simpsons

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( Mathematics, Science ) - ( Computers ) - ( Aviation ) - ( Humorous ) - ( Quirky )

( Music, Arts )

Music-making as a means of getting money is hell.
      - Gustav Holst (English composer, 1874 - 1934)

Vivaldi didn't write 400 concertos; he wrote one concerto 400 times.
      - Igor Stravinsky (Russian composer, 1882 - 1971)

Some people take music too seriously, and some don't take it seriously enough, others take it just right...
      - John Cage (U.S. composer, 1912 - 1992), during a music workshop

A work of art is never completed, only abandoned.
      - Anon.

Reality is a crutch for those that can't handle science fiction.
      - Anon.

Reality is a crutch for people who can't deal with science fiction.
      - Anon.

I believe that the use of noise to make music will continue and increase until we reach a music produced through the aid of electrical instruments.
      - John Cage, 1937 (U.S. composer, 1912 - 1992)

Leading tones? You surely aren't talking about ascending half-steps in diatonic music. Is it not true that anything leads to whatever follows?
      - John Cage (U.S. composer, 1912 - 1992)

Mother said, "I've listened to your record several times. After hearing all those stories about your childhood, I keep asking myself, 'Where was it that I failed?'"
      - John Cage (U.S. composer, 1912 - 1992)

      - J. R. R. Tolkien, when accused of escapism in his books:
Yes, but if we're in prison, to escape is the right thing to do.
      (Perhaps slightly paraphrased)

I'm tone dumb, which is worse than being tone deaf because you know you're singing out of tune but can't do anything about it.
      - Paul Clarke: rec.arts.sf.written

In Italy for thirty years under the Borgias they had warfare, terror, murder, bloodshed - but they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, and the Renaissance. In Switzerland they had brotherly love, five hundred years of democracy and peace, and what did they produce? The cuckoo clock.
      - Orson Welles (1915 - 1984, U.S. filmmaker, actor): "The Third Man" (1949)

      Yes, but if I or people close to me had to suffer the warfare and terror personally, I would sacrifice da Vinci, Michelangelo, and the Renaissance - perhaps with some regret, because I value humanity's great achievements in art and culture - but sacrifice it, all the same - and accept the cuckoo-clocks, even though they don't strike me as one of the high points of human creativity. And even if the warfare, terror, etc. didn't affect me personally or those close to me, I should be prepared to sacrifice great art if the conditions necessary for its development require a history of violence and war, and it became possible to eliminate this from human history.
      If it takes such levels of human misery and suffering to produce great art, and it becomes possible one day to eliminate such suffering, but only at the cost of great art and culture, then perhaps we must bite the bullet and do it. Art built upon human misery is not worthy of a decent human race, seductive though it may be for those who appreciate it. Perhaps even something as wonderful as the best art humanity can produce can come at too high a price.
      However, I am obviously speaking of an ideal world here - one we will probably never have, or at least not until humanity has evolved far beyond its present level. I don't expect that to happen any time soon. Meanwhile, if we have no choice about whether we have war and terror, or democracy and brotherly love, we might as well appreciate the art war supposedly produces, since we will be paying the price for it whether we appreciate it or not.

Welles later claimed that this statement was based on a fragment of an old Hungarian play.

[Note: I found so many slight variations of this quote on the web that I cannot be sure the wording I have chosen to use here is exactly correct.]

The country which does not spend money on arts ends up spending it on prisons.
      - Saying translated from Polish (source unknown - possibly paraphrased) - posted on Orchestra List.

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( Mathematics, Science ) - ( Computers ) - ( Aviation ) - ( Humorous ) - ( Quirky )

( Society, Politics )

The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.
      - Bill Watterson (American cartoonist, 1958 - ): from "Calvin and Hobbes" comic strip

The louder someone is speaking, the less likely they're saying anything important.
      - quoted (written?) by "Steen" on Geek Culture forum

McDonald's is the ultimate symbol of passive conformity.
      - John Ralston Saul (quoted by Phillip Adams on "Late Night Live" on A.B.C. Radio National, Thursday, 17 January, 2002)

Caution: Cape does not enable user to fly.
      - Batman costume warning label, WalMart, 1995

If you have the same ideas as everybody else but have them one week earlier than everyone else then you will be hailed as a visionary, but if you have them five years earlier you will be named a lunatic.
      - Barry Jones (Australian Labor politician)

The Governor-General didn't follow the first law of holes: when you're in one, stop digging.
      - An A.B.C. radio journalist, ca. 19 February, 2002, referring to the television statement made by Australian Governor-General, Dr. Peter Hollingworth, in a misjudged attempt to relieve the moral and political pressure he was under to resign over allegations that he presided as Archbishop over the covering up of sexual abuse of children within the Anglican Church.

We've [i.e., We in Australia have] got two creatures big of bum and small of brain - the emu and the kangaroo - and perhaps it's symbolic of our culture.
      - A.B.C. current affairs radio host Phillip Adams, during an interview he conducted about wombats, rebroadcast 15 January, 2002

      These two animals are on Australia's coat of arms. I leave it up to the reader to decide whether the symbolism can be carried further than Phillip Adams explicitly stated in the above quote.

The best way to make a small fortune in the wine industry is to start with a large fortune and plant a vineyard.
      - A guest on A.B.C. radio program, "The Comfort Zone", Saturday, 8 December, 2001; either Ben Canaider or Greg Duncan Powell

      - This was said during a discussion about an affair between former Australian politicians Gareth Evans and Cheryl Kernot:
I don't care which politicians are screwing each other; I'm more concerned about the politicians that are screwing us as a nation.
      - Jenny, a caller to "Australia Talks Back" (A.B.C. talkback program), 2002

      - Former Australian Prime Minister Paul Keating:
Never get between a [State] Premier and a bucket of money.
      - quoted on A.B.C. Radio National, 5 April, 2002

The First Law of Holes: When you're in one, stop digging!
      - Anon.

The bigger the lie, the more people will believe it.
      - Joseph Goebbels (Nazi propaganda minister)

If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it people will eventually come to believe it.
      - Joseph Goebbels (Nazi propaganda minister)

I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.
      - Albert Einstein (American (German-born) theoretical physicist, 1879 - 1955)

If you're not pissed off at the world, you're just not paying attention.
      - Heard twice on A.B.C. Radio National
      - Almost certainly taken from Australian singer Kasey Chambers, in "Ignorance", from album Barricades and Brick Walls

Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, and small minds discuss people.
      - Phil Spector (U.S. rock music record producer and songwriter, 1940 - ).

"Never believe a rumour until it is officially denied." French official at a meeting attended with SNCF in Paris, 1987.
      - quoted by "Maikha" on RailPage Australia Forum.

      - Former Australian Labor Party Government Minister and Government leader in the Senate, John Button, after being asked if he thought that the Labor Party's best hope for winning a Federal election is for Liberal Prime Minister John Howard to leave politics:
John Howard will leave at some time - even if it's in a box.
      - Friday, 28 November, 2003 - the day Labor leader Simon Crean quit the leadership amid ongoing bickering and chaos in the Labor Party.

      - Dr. John Hewson, former leader of the Australian Federal Liberal Party and Leader of the Opposition at the time:
John Howard will be carried out in a box; I agree, John Button.
      - Tuesday, 13 July, 2004, during an A.B.C. Late Night Live program in which Phillip Adams interviewed John Button and John Hewson together, and discussing the possibility of Peter Costello succeeding John Howard as the next Liberal Party leader and possibly next Prime Minister of Australia.
      The context: Adams, Button, and Hewson were discussing whether Treasurer Peter Costello was electable as Howard's successor, because of his unpopularity with the electorate; Adams thought Costello saw Labor Treasury spokesman and one-time would-be Labor leader Simon Crean as less popular still, and Adams thought this was why Costello wanted to have a debate with Crean on television.
    John Button: But I don't think it'll be an enormous factor [referring to the possibility of Costello taking over the leadership, and this affecting the outcome of the election]; I think people believe that Howard wants to stay there till he's a hundred.
    John Hewson: Yeah, I think neither Costello nor Crean are electable, as I understand the polling, and in that sense it does seem - it doesn't matter - John Howard will be carried out in a box; I agree, John Button.
    Phillip Adams: You look enthusiastic about the prospect, John Hewson.

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( Mathematics, Science ) - ( Computers ) - ( Aviation ) - ( Humorous ) - ( Quirky )

( Mathematics, Science )

So, naturalists observe, a flea
Has smaller fleas that on him prey;
And these have smaller still to bite 'em;
And so proceed ad infinitum.
      - Jonathan Swift (Irish satirist and man of letters, 1667 - 1745): Poetry, a Rhapsody

Great fleas have little fleas
    Upon their backs to bite 'em,
And little fleas have lesser fleas,
    And so ad infinitum.
The great fleas themselves, in turn,
    Have greater fleas to go on;
While these again have greater still,
    And greater still, and so on.
      - Augustus De Morgan (English mathematician, 1806 - 1871) (obviously with Swift in mind): A Budget of Paradoxes, p. 377

Any civilization that doesn't develop space travel dies.
      - Carl Sagan

Space isn't remote at all. It's only an hour's drive away if your car could go straight upwards.
      - Sir Fred Hoyle (English astrophysicist, 1915 - 2001), in the London "Observer"

Black holes are where God divided by zero.
      - Steven Wright (American comedian, 1955 - )

By relieving the brain of all unnecessary work, a good notation sets it free to concentrate on more advanced problems, and, in effect, increases the mental power of the race. Before the introduction of the Arabic notation, multiplication was difficult, and the division even of integers called into play the highest mathematical faculties. Probably nothing in the modern world would have more astonished a Greek mathematician than to learn that ... a large proportion of the population of Western Europe could perform the operation of division for the largest numbers. This fact would have seemed to him a sheer impossibility ... Our modern power of easy reckoning with decimal fractions is the almost miraculous result of the gradual discovery of a perfect notation. [...] By the aid of symbolism, we can make transitions in reasoning almost mechanically, by the eye, which otherwise would call into play the higher faculties of the brain. [...] It is a profoundly erroneous truism, repeated by all copy-books and by eminent people when they are making speeches, that we should cultivate the habit of thinking of what we are doing. The precise opposite is the case. Civilisation advances by extending the number of important operations which we can perform without thinking about them. Operations of thought are like cavalry charges in a battle - they are strictly limited in number, they require fresh horses, and must only be made at decisive moments.
      - Alfred North Whitehead: An Introduction to Mathematics, 1911

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( Mathematics, Science ) - ( Computers ) - ( Aviation ) - ( Humorous ) - ( Quirky )

( Computers )

A: Because it breaks the natural flow of the conversation.
Q: What is top posting and why is it so bad?
      - "agentmeh" on RailPage Australia Forum.

The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense.
      - Edsger Wybe Dijkstra (Dutch computer scientist, 1930 - 2002)

It is practically impossible to teach good programming style to students that have had prior exposure to BASIC: as potential programmers they are mentally mutilated beyond hope of regeneration.
      - Edsger Wybe Dijkstra (Dutch computer scientist, 1930 - 2002): SIGPLAN Notices, Volume 17, Number 5
      - alternatively: Selected Writings on Computing: A Personal Perspective

C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg.
      - Bjarne Stroustrup (American (Danish-born) computer scientist, developer of C++ programming language, 1951 - )

There are two ways of constructing a software design; one way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies, and the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies. The first method is far more difficult.
      - C.A.R. (Tony) Hoare (English computer scientist)

There's no laptop like home.
      - António Nunes (composer and music engraver)

There's no home like a laptop.
      - António Nunes (composer and music engraver)

wherever you lay your laptop,
that's your home.
      - António Nunes (composer and music engraver)

Home is where my laptop is.
      - António Nunes (composer and music engraver)

Home is wherever you lay your laptop.
      - António Nunes (composer and music engraver)

reality.sys corrupted. universe halted. reboot (y/n)?
      - quoted from "SupportGoddess" on Geek Culture forum

Oh, I had a problem with Windows 95 but I typed FORMAT C: and it works a lot better now.
      - Anonymous

* For those with little computer knowledge and overwhelmed by Windows difficulties, see this
cautionary note.

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( Mathematics, Science ) - ( Computers ) - ( Aviation ) - ( Humorous ) - ( Quirky )

( Aviation )

When once you have tasted flight, you will forever walk the Earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been, and there you will always long to return.
      - Leonardo da Vinci, 1452 - 1519

I ask people who don't fly, "How can you not fly when you live in a time in history when you can fly?"
      - William Langewische, 2001

We who fly do so for the love of flying. We are alive in the air with this miracle that lies in our hands and beneath our feet.
      - Cecil Day Lewis

If you have flown, perhaps you can understand the love a pilot develops for flight. It is much the same emotion a man feels for a woman, or a wife for her husband.
      - Louise Thaden, co-founder of the Ninty-Nines

You can always tell when a man has lost his soul to flying. The poor bastard is hopelessly committed to stopping whatever he is doing long enough to look up and make sure the aircraft purring overhead continues on course and does not suddenly fall out of the sky. It is also his bound duty to watch every aircraft within view take off and land.
      - Ernest K. Gann, "Fate is the Hunter"

Flying is a lot like playing a musical instrument; you're doing so many things and thinking of so many other things, all at the same time. It becomes a spiritual experience. Something wonderful happens in the pit of your stomach.
      - Dusty McTavish

I would recommend a solo flight to all prospective suicides. It tends to make clear the issue of whether one enjoys being alive or not.
      - T. H. White, "England Have My Bones", 1936

In a world full of people only some want to fly - isn't that crazy?
      - from the lyrics of a song called "Crazy", by Seal

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( Mathematics, Science ) - ( Computers ) - ( Aviation ) - ( Humorous ) - ( Quirky )

( Humorous )

If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.
      - Anon.

Hermits have no peer pressure.
      - Unknown

      - Sir Thomas Beecham (English orchestra conductor), when asked what he thought of Stainer's "Crucifixion":
A good idea.

      - Beecham, when asked if he had ever conducted any Stockhausen:
No, but I once trod in some.

A closed mouth gathers no feet.
      - Anon.

Eat right, exercise, die anyway.
      - bumper sticker

What use are socks? They only produce holes.
      - Albert Einstein (American (German-born) theoretical physicist, 1879 - 1955), justifying his abandoning the wearing of socks.

God put me on this earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now I am so far behind that I will never die.
      - Bill Watterson (American cartoonist, 1958 - ): from "Calvin and Hobbes" comic strip

      - "Mahatma" Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi, Indian nationalist leader (1869 - 1948), when asked what he thought of Western civilization:
I think it would be a good idea.

Maybe this world is another planet's hell.
      - Aldous Huxley (English novelist, 1894 - 1963)

Top - ( Spiritual, Mystical ) - ( Philosophical ) - ( Sceptical ) - ( Music, Arts ) - ( Society, Politics ) -
( Mathematics, Science ) - ( Computers ) - ( Aviation ) - ( Humorous ) - ( Quirky )

( Quirky )

As the world becomes ever more crowded, so folding will become ever more important.
      - Guy Browning

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
      - Unknown

And he disappeared in a puff of logic.
      - Douglas Adams: The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
      - Unknown

Eagles may soar, but roosters don't get sucked into jet engines.
      - "Angry Rooster" on Geek Culture forum

          David   Tudor           gives   the    impression
                   of    not    being    overly    fond    of
                          But    one    night    he    had    two
             helpings    of    morels            and    then
           finished    the    dish    completely,
                    including    the    juice.
                                                    The    next
           afternoon    while    he    was    shaving
             I    read    out    loud    the    following
          quotation    from    Leonardo    da    Vinci:
           Some    there    are    who    can    call
          themselves   nothing   more   than   a   passage
           for    food,                        producers    of
            dung,                        fillers    up    of
          privies,                        for    of    them
          nothing   else   appears    in    the    world
                nor    is    there    any    virtue    in    their
             work,                        for    nothing    of
           them    remains            but    full    privies.''

              David    Tudor    said,
          ``Perhaps    they    were     good     Buddhists.''
      - John Cage (U.S. composer, Zen Buddhist, and mushroom expert, 1912 - 1992): M (1974)

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
      - Anon. (Play on "Do not meddle in the affairs of wizards, for they are subtle and quick to anger.", from The Fellowship of the Ring, by J. R. R. Tolkien)

A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn.
      - Tibetan proverb (this attribution is as found in several sources)

A meal without mushrooms is like a day without rain.
      - John Cage (U.S. composer and mushroom expert, 1912 - 1992)

My karma just ran over your dogma.
      - Car bumper sticker

Top - ( Spiritual, Mystical ) - ( Philosophical ) - ( Sceptical ) - ( Music, Arts ) - ( Society, Politics ) -
( Mathematics, Science ) - ( Computers ) - ( Aviation ) - ( Humorous ) - ( Quirky )

* No - don't do it. It's a joke against Windows. Taking it literally will wipe your hard disk, and the joke was that Windows is so bug-ridden and unreliable that erasing it from your computer makes it work better.
[Read the
above quote about Windows 95 to see what this is referring to.]

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This page linked to web site Wednesday, 17 September, 2002 (written on various days before that);
last modified on Saturday, 20 August, 2005.